The Healing Ceremony

Lots of you have asked about my healing ceremony so I wanted to share a little. The ceremony was held at Janey Wynne’s place, a cottage up above Port au Prince. It was a dark and stormy night until the clouds lifted the reveal the stars and Coleen and Dja wiped down the chairs so we could sit cozy under the open gazebo. Before we sat, the space was prepared with incense (earth and air), water, a candle (fire). And, we all gently sang Gabriela to sleep in Matt’s lap.

To the ceremony we invited all that and who is part of us, past and present.
I lit candles from the centre candle and named each with one of my fears.
Volunteers held the candles and we all prayed for the release of the fears. Then I released the fears one by one extinguishing their light and replacing them with my commitments to walk among others, be authentic in relationships, wholeness, and to trust that my gifts will be transformed in the process.
We prayed.
Drumming brought us back.
Then as we sat in a round, we sewed together a medicine bag, representing my re-member-ing and remembering who i am with out the eating disorder. Into the medicine bag, I put symbols to remind me of my wholeness as part of the whole universe.

The candles were re-lit and my commitments sent into the heavens.
Then we went inside and Amy served us the best chai tea ever.

I am the kind of person who likes to try different things. (duh!) It wasn't until after I graduated from university and had returned to university that i realized if you just do exactly what the teacher says, you will get an A (and that's because that's exactly what the prof. said) I was always trying to do it like that with a creative twist. My creative spirit has brought me into many adventures-- lots of bike trips and skinny dipping, Senegal and chimp tracking etc., not to mention marriage, AND also the 9 year adventure of an eating disorder. The Kikuyu of Kenya say "Coming out of your house is learning." But maybe i would add that you often have to come back home to realize that you've learned something while out and also that how much you learn is proportional to how freaked out you get on the way. In many ways the healing ceremony was my homecoming.

I’m going to do a little advocacy here too regarding eating disorders after having one. 1. do what you love – I like this quote by Audre Lorde (an activist of Caribbean decent): “When I dare to be powerful - to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid". It’s true. 2. don’t comment on people’s weight, good or bad. it’s really a non-issue like height. but it’s also a marketing strategy and it’s making millions by making us think we can change something that we can’t. (that’s why an eating disorder which is about control NOT about food or weight manifests itself in food and weight). we can change how we think about ourselves though, by not by ourselves.

thanks for joining with me in this fight please support the women in your life with confidence and positive role models

Esther STAR child of God