My Haitian Grandmas

One of my two grandmas left today.   I don't actually know her name for 4 months now, we've been growing close so that in the past few weeks I've been calling her "Gran" along with Gabriela and Niko.    
On Saturday, in the all too typical style of grown-Haitian children living in North America, they called her and told her that her plane ticket was for the plane on Sunday giving her just a week to collect herself and her things and make her way to Port au Prince.   She spent the week grilling and pounding coffee, drying and sifting cassava flour, & making cocoa to take along with her to Florida where her daughter and 3 granddaughters await her.   She is excited to see her grandchildren but doesn't like being "stuck inside" or "not having any way to make some money" and "not having anything to eat".   She is 75.  

My other grandma is leaving next Tuesday.   She is Marilyn, semi-retired tour guide who was raised on the east coast of the US but has lived 40 years in Europe mostly and currently still Geneva.   She came to Haiti to volunteer for a month because "I wanted to see Haiti" and related because her friend's daughter died here in the UN headquarters during the earthquake (Jan 2012).    She is a grandma to one granddaughter who lives in Singapore and a grandson in London.  Marilyn and I have been chatting about once a day to check in and report on the cultural clashes of the day.    She is a seasoned traveler and street-wise, the kind of visitor to Haiti that doesn't jump to conclusions or solutions : )   Marilyn leaves on Tuesday and I will miss her.  

Haiti is a place where, in many cases, several generations can be found sleeping in the same lakou (yard).   I don't know any of my foreign friends who desire to live with their parents and I wouldn't want to live with mine or Marilyn for that matter.   But when the Gran told me she was leaving, my immediate thoughts were: how can you leave me? who is going to look after us? who is going to send food over once in a while and bring Gabriela and Matt coffee on Saturday mornings? who is going to tell me not to lift buckets while holding a baby? who is going to greet my kids with joy?  who is going to instill order in the household without a word?  
Having a Haitian grandma around was really nice and I hope now that I am the matriarch of the house, I can keep her spirit of stable presence and traditional values alive.